Answering machine message

[mesaysi]

This is the message that the Pacific Palisades High School (California) staff voted unanimously to record on their school telephone answering machine this is the actual answering machine message for the school. This came about because they implemented a policy requiring students and parents to be responsible for their children's absences and missing homework. The school and teachers are being sued by parents who want their children's failing grades changed to passing grades - even though those children were absent 15-30 times during the semester and did not complete enough schoolwork to pass their classes.


The outgoing message:
"Hello! You have reached the automated answering service of your school. In order to assist you in connecting to the right staff member, please listen to all the options before making a selection:
* To lie about why your child is absent - Press 1
* To make excuses for why your child did not do his work- Press 2
* To complain about what we do - Press 3
* To swear at staff members - Press 4
* To ask why you didn't get information that was already enclosed in your newsletter and several flyers mailed to you - Press 5
* If you want us to raise your child - Press 6
* If you want to reach out and touch, slap or hit someone -Press 7
* To request another teacher, for the third time this year -Press 8
* To complain about bus transportation - Press 9
* To complain about school lunches - Press 0
* If you realize this is the real world and your child must be
Accountable and responsible for his/her own behavior, class work, homework and that it's not the teachers' fault for your child's lack of effort: Hang up and have a nice day!" ;D

[bobdezon]

False,

http://www.snopes.com/humor/iftrue/palisades.asp

[mesaysi]

It was a joke...notice I did not post it on the news section.

[bobdezon]

liberal usage of the word "allegedly" might have helped there ^-^

[mesaysi]

So sorry next time I will make sure to tack a big bold note saying *joke ahead....beware of joke* O0

[bobdezon]

lol ^-^

[Matt]

"This is real" "This is genuine" "This is the actual" blah blah. What part of telling a joke requires all these false claims as to its authenticity?

A real Enlishman and genuine Irishman and no true Scotsman...

[seren]

Well....this one kind of requires it. I mean, if it had started:

"Here's a load of stuff I made up that didn't really happen but it would be funny if it did, right?"

I probably wouldn't have read it. It needs implied (if not outright stated) authenticity to be amusing. Otherwise it's just a list of stuff.

I'm either talking utter nonsense or have uncovered a deep truth about humankind.

[mesaysi]

I had received this in an email as a joke nothing more. Any person who knows anything about a school can clearly see that this would never be an actual answering machine message. But I have already admitted (yes sarcastically) that I should have put something up as a warning. But thank you all for pointing this out to me five times, well done!

[seren]

Hey! I resent that! I wasn't pointing anything out to you, I was arguing with Matt!

Wow, all this fuss for a joke....:smiley:

[mesaysi]

Hey! I resent that! I wasn't pointing anything out to you, I was arguing with Matt!

Wow, all this fuss for a joke....:smiley:



Well color me red...I counted wrong. And yes it is a lot of fuss for a stupid joke. I had hoped that a joke might "break the ice" so to speak with people that I do truly admire.

[Matt]

Well color me red...I counted wrong. And yes it is a lot of fuss for a stupid joke. I had hoped that a joke might "break the ice" so to speak with people that I do truly admire.

I didn't realise you counted wrong, I thought you were exagerating for comic effect :smiley:

I'll point out that i was making a subtle joke too... Just trying to moeve the coversation along.

It wasn't very funny for which I appologise but I wasn't really having a go at you.

[mesaysi]

I am seriously regretting ever even posting this dumb joke. I did think it was funny because it was so completely ridiculous to think that a school would ever do something that would so blatantly incur a lawsuit.

[Matt]

Well....this one kind of requires it. I mean, if it had started:

"Here's a load of stuff I made up that didn't really happen but it would be funny if it did, right?"

I probably wouldn't have read it. It needs implied (if not outright stated) authenticity to be amusing. Otherwise it's just a list of stuff.

I'm either talking utter nonsense or have uncovered a deep truth about humankind.

Thing is when somebody starts a joke with all the "True Story" preamble it often tips you off that it's not a joke that can't cut it on its own.

As you say you wouldn't have read it if it had said "Here's a load of stuff I made up that didn't really happen but it would be funny if it did, right" But what if it said neither. What if it just had the message with no preamble? Would that be funny?

In this case it's not too bad. It doesn't fall flat on its face without the preamble. Other times you get jokes that are just so weak they use the "true story" preable as an excuse to tell it, a way to set low expectations.

Sometimes it is a true story and is interesting as such. It'd be gossip even if there weren't the added humour. Other times it's just a weak joke that pretends to be a true story and that's a little sad.

Does anybody remember when we used to tell jokes? now I see people even in the same room pulling out their mobile phones and showing each other jokes, smiling weakly and passing the phone back or laughing and saying something like "ooh send me that one I know just how I'll forward it too."

Telling a joke has been replaced by hitting forward. We have so little invested in joke telling that we just don't care if they work or not. We rarely see the recipients faces when they read the joke so feedback is almost negligable. When we told jokes face to face we took much more pride in our jokes. They were funnier.

What was the last joke you told out loud?

I'm afraid mine in such poor taste it requires a spoiler warning...

Highlight below if you are unlikley to be offended by sick houmour

Jill Dando's husband wanted to paint their front door green... But she was dead against it.

[seren]

;D

Is that true?! ;)

[mesaysi]

Matt,

I don't rightly remember the last joke I said aloud. I'm sure it was something from the internet read to a family member that does not have internet.

I should have done a bit of research on this "joke" before posting it. But I think I was too eager to share something that I found funny with all of you. I should be the first one to admit that I am impatient when it involves research into something I do not care deeply about. This "joke" qualifies as something I do not care deeply about.

I do appreciate all the advice. Even though I do act like a smart***.